foolish

i cant explain why its not enough, ok this my fault but did you realize?
i sit and wait and wonder alone,
my mistake was stupid,
i realize i'm wrong,
i'm sorry, really sorry
oh, wait, i think, you can't,
because a tear rolled down your face as i started to leave,
he said baby don't do this, i'm begging you please!
i said im leaving because
i cant live this way
i dont care if you cry,
i dont care what you say.
youre not going to change how i feel about you,
im done we're over..
this time we're through!
i know this hurt and think about it every second,
there's no more about... me and you!

a moment

just a moment, i pray like this. yes ofcourse. i really wanna make it work, on my promises, just make it work, always i try, but i dont know if i have another chance, arghhhh but i wont. i wont but i want it. NO! its like in between, but i think its just a moment. yeah i swear!

realize

the greatest thing i'll ever learn is to love and be loved in return.
i found this man in my miserable.
he came with a bunch of caring and happiness, he always make me smile and laugh.
he is the only one i can trust ( i try) and
i really dont wanna make him feels like a foolish who cant make a girl trust to him,
yeah baby i'm trying, always.
i always love him, because i think he loves making my day,
he surely doesnt mind when all i want is the warmth of his touch.

it makes everything else seem pointless.
and i can find arms that will hold me at my weakest,
eyes that will see me at my ugliest,
and a heart that will love me at my worst, then i've found true love, my pray.

i see you in my dreams at night and we live together, forever,
but when i wake up i realize that it was only a dream.
i always pray that my dreams can be true, i dont know when exatcly but surely it will..

said so...

oh God, please tell how i supposed to do, because i feel like no forgiveness in me, for every minute i'm angry, its like i lose much of happiness that i have, its like my anger is a killing thing, it kills who love who care and who does. i speak when i am angry and i will make the best speech i will ever regret, and i feel like cant breath like this world drops me on. and i thought this true,

If you hate a person, you hate something in him that is part of yourself.
What isn't part of ourselves doesn't disturb us.

oh it kills my feeling...

'Miras' memabukkan

kehidupan kelas 12 ini membuat menjadi kalang kabut. dari jadwal les gue yang selasa kamis terus di tambah lagi intensif jumat sabtu belom lagi pm (pendalaman materi) yang memakan jatah sabtu gue, ampe gue harus masuk jam setengah 7 juga buat pergi ke sekolah, emang nista! (curhat dikit)

tapi di balik itu semua gue menunggu hari yang sangat ingin gue jumpai, bukan usm itb memang (pengennya langsung masuk itb nya, AMIN ya Allah), tapi ini doa dan harapan gue dari taun yang lalu pokonye dari jauh-jauh ari. dan gue sangat beriri hati pas seorang teman gue yang di German udah pernah nonton Jason Mraz duluan bulan July'08, yaah namanya juga Germany beda yaaak sama Indonesah!
dan fortunately, gue dapet kabar dah dari dia kalo si Mraz mau manggung di Indo, pas Java Jazz. Gokil! memang gokil! Jason Mraz? sama Java Jazz? yaah nyambung lah walopun rada gimana gitu tapi nyambung lah (malahan katanya Slank mau manggung di Java Jazz? Lho kok? hahaha bodoamat dah yang penting Mraz ke Indo) hahaha akhirnyaaaa si tuan Mraz sudi juga ke Indonesia.

yaah sedikit info aja kenapa gue suka sama nih abang-abang atu. dia punya vokal yang gue suka banget, musik nya yang groovy banget bikin gue jadi tambah gurih dan lebih merasa crispy. gue dari dulu dah suka ama nih bocah dari jaman single the remedy nya dia keluar, akhirnyaa ampe i'm yours nya dia laku keras di pasaran, rakyat Indo pun mulai bergeliat untuk mengapresiasi musiknya bang Mraz, salut deh! pokonya i heart Jason Mraz a lot! Nih foto abang Mraz lagi on the stage pas di German, kabal yang motoin, fyi; kabal = ka iqbal = iqbal = temen gue yang di German yang udah nonton Mraz duluan dan ini hasil jepretannya,

Mraz sama om-om gondrong garuk-garuk kutuan

Mraz sama om-om buta yang bermain gendang

dan ini......... MANTAP!

dan perjuangan gue buat beli tiket jason mraz on Java Jazz, penuh lika-liku, lubang berbahaya dan jurang kenistaan. yaaaah nasib gue lumayan apes sih emang, dapet Mraz ke Indo pas udah kelas 12, seminggu sebelum usm ITB, pen UN juga pula, hahaha tapi nggak apa!
yang penting gue bisa nonton Mraz dah hahaha rada nekat emang, tapi gue udah beli tiket dong yang ampe gue usahain gara-gara gue udah nggak dapet dana sukarela dari orangtua gue, karna yaa pasti sih mereka nggak setuju pas gue bilang mau nonton Mraz gara-gara udah mau UN katanya, yaaaah bodo amat lah gue mikir nonton Mraz 2 jam-an doang nggak bikin gue nggak lulus UN kok (bukan takabur kok, cuma kalo gue di rumah-pun paling bengong juga mending gue nonton Mraz kan, ketauan memorable ketimbang gue bengong-an doangan di rumah)

usaha gue buat ngumpulin duit 435ribu gue kumpulin selama 2 minggu, duit jajan gue simpen nggak gue pake, alhasil nyomot makan orang sama minum orang kalo bekel dari emak gue udah habis termakan, pokonya gimana cara gue nggak buang duit se-sen pun buat jajan, kecuali sih kalo emang hasrat gue buat jajan udah terlalu tak terbendung, ya gue jajan aja buat menghilangkan stress akan kerinduan makanan sekolah, yaudah akhirnya gue beli tiket pre-sale jadinya cuma 435ribu daripada gue beli yang harga biasa tekor banget dah 750 rebu, beda 315ribu. yaaah akhirnya usaha gue nggak sia-sia buat dapet tiket javajazz + special show 'JASON MRAZ'

yaaah sekarang sih gue cuma berdoa ajaa semoga si Mraz nggak nge-cancel show dia Indonesa gara-gara travel warning apalagi gara-gara kampanye partai di Indonesa kan pas banget tuh mau pemilu, dih malesin banget daaah kalo sampe kaga jadi maaah.

WELCOME 2009!

yah Welcome 2009! (walopun gue nge-post telat banget)

berati ...
welcome juga buat intensif
welcome juga buat USM ITB
welcome juga buat SIMAK-UI
welcome juga buat UJIAN NASIONAL dan UAS
welcome juga buat GRADUATION - ( BIG AMIN! )

doain gue yee biar bisa keterima di universitas sama fakultas yang gue mau sama LULUS UAN.
AMIN. AMIN. AMIN

nih taun bikin gue deg-deg-an nya setengah gempor! ya Allah hanya pada diri-Mu lah hamba bersimpuh tolong kabulkan doa hamba-Mu ini ya Allah. Amin!

Wassalam.